I thought I would take the time to blog about the positives that come with BPD.
BPD is always seen as a negative and pretty awful diagnosis. I’m not saying that it’s a walk in the park or easy by any means I just thought it was important to shake things up and focus on those positives.
There were times that I would wish and pray that someone could just take this diagnosis away and that it would never have entered my life and darkened my door. Now however, I do think a little differently.
I don’t wish I never had BPD. Without it I wouldn’t be me! I wouldn’t be were I am today. I wouldn’t have the amazing people I now have in my life. There are definitely aspects of it that I wish wouldn’t be so severe but I am learning to look at the positives and be thankful.
It’s funny looking back at how things used to be.
How things have changed.
I’m far from being at the end of my “journey” but I am already a different person to who I was a few years ago. I am actually a person for a start. Not just a shadow of one.
I expect you have probably heard of a coping skills tool box before now. Definitely if you have been through he mental health system in one way or another. But maybe you’ve heard of it even if you don’t, as mental health seems to be all over the media at the moment.
It is something that I was first introduced to when I was very poorly in hospital. But I was not in any state at the time to really understand how useful it could really be. Had I been offered help in making one or had it fully explained and/or shown to me, perhaps, I would have created one much earlier than I did. I put my coping skills tool box together a few months ago – better late than never hey!
What’s life really like after a suicide attempt?
People tend to think that “It’s all over now” “She didn’t die so back to normal” “Up her medication and it will all be fine!”
Seriously you have no idea how wrong this is!
Why is Mental Health still treated like a second rate illness and not as important as physical illnesses? Is it the less important illness because you cant see it? Or is it because people don’t understand it?
I really don’t know but I feel that something needs to change.
How would you feel if you broke your leg? You are in a lot of pain and discomfort. Scared. Not really knowing how bad it really is. You finally get through to see a Dr who tells you it’s a bad break. It will effect your life for quite some time. But they can help. They can put it in a cast and begin the healing process.
Thank God for that, you think.
You have to go on a waiting list.
You have to go home, take a few tablets each day and hopefully in 3/4 months we might be able to help you.
I am a Yogi and proud!
I am literally Yoga obsessed and I practice everyday. I read books and blogs about Yoga. I get super excited when I learn a new pose, I just love it!
I started practising yoga properly in around May time last year and it really has become a must in my daily routine. It makes me feel great both mentally and physically.
“You wear a mask for so long you forget who you are underneath.”
“The saddest people smile the brightest!” Robin Williams
The Mask or ‘My Mask’ is something I have written and drawn about over the past few years. Before this I don’t even know if I even realised I was wearing one.
Since I have been poorly and more vocal about my mental health issues, I have had so many people message me saying,
“I never knew you were ill”
“How did I never know?”
“I’ve known you for years and I would never have guessed!”
“You always seem so happy, confident, chatty etc …”
Well this is precisely why I am talking about my Mask today. Just because someone is smiling doesn’t always mean they are happy. That smile may hide something.
Firstly I’d like to wish you all a happy new year! I hope your 2017 brings you all the love, happiness and prosperity life has to offer.
I’m starting 2017 with a blog about how my mental health has been the best it has been over Christmas for many many years.
I suffer with depression and Boarderline Personality Disorder, amongst other things, but I also suffer with S.A.D (Seasonal Affective Disorder). As many of you know S.A.D begins as the weather gets colder and the days get darker and usually lasts the whole of winter.
The darker mornings and evenings and even the dark days seem to physically drain me and stuck the happiness and positivity out of me. Leaving me feeling downright miserable! I also seem to catch every bug going and take forever to recover from them.
I would sleep badly and find it near impossible to get out of bed in the morning and going to sleep at night would involve me fighting to get to 8pm before I collapse exhausted into my bed!
Coping skills for living with a mental illness varies so much from person to person. So I’m just going to focus on my positive coping skills and what helps me when I’m struggling.
Art is something that I have always been passionate about. Whether it’s drawing, painting, writing stories or poetry. I love anything that involves creativity. When I was first put into hospital a few years ago I was in an extremely bad place. I couldn’t talk to people without my entire body shaking or feeling like my heart was about to explode out of my chest. Eye contact was even difficult in the beginning. So I kept myself to myself generally in the corner of the same room. I began to watch the other patients drawing and sketching and it instantly made me want to do it too. I got myself a set of pencils and a sketch pad and began to draw and write poetry. I kept my art very private as I was convinced it was all shit.
But it allowed me to escape.
It allowed me to leave and get away without having to physically disappear. I craved it! It seemed to give me some joy and purpose (no matter how small in the beginning).