It’s still hard to admit I’m struggling.
I have never found it easy (or possible at all) to ask for help. To say “I’m stuck.” or “I’m struggling”.
It doesn’t matter what it was regarding, work, housework, mental or physical health. I just believe I should be able to do these things. I should be able to get on with these things in my life the way that everyone else does. Not bothering people or being a burden.
4 of my favourite self help and development books
I read a lot. I always have. I love reading a whole host of different books too, from Harry Potter to Shakespeare to self help and development books.
I have been a fan of the self help book category for a number of years. The feel good books that build you up with positivity and give you reasons for living when days might become dark or you might just be feeling a little lost.
Wow, so here I am! My 1st anniversary and World Mental Health day 2017.
A year ago today I would never have dreamed my blog would be as successful as it has been. I have been lucky enough to write for some fantastic charities including Mind, Time to Change and Beat, and have had my work published on several big sites online, I am 1 in 4,The mighty and Huffington Post included.
I have also been lucky enough to work with several brands that are just fantastic – Lumie, Mum’s back and CuddleBug to name a few. My work is being shared more and more every single day and the opportinites are getting bigger and better.
I absolutely love art and anything creative. I always have. Not only does it help my mental well being but my purse too.
When the idea of upcycling started to become more popular I jumped straight in and immediately got involved! I really do love it! Much to my husbands dismay I regularly have at least one project on the go.
I am always on the look out for things that I can bring back to life and give my own special touch too.
I can look at an old pallet and see a bookshelf – my husband doesn’t quite get it until i am finished but he humours me through the process and often helps me if I have taken on anything too big and need help sawing or drilling.
As majority of you reading my blog will know I suffered with post natal depression (PND) quite severely after the birth of my son.
Being pregnant is a blessing and I am so grateful that I am getting to experience it for a second time.
However, I must admit that I was very naive in assuming that it would be just like the first. I underestimated just how different being pregnant with a 4 year in tow would be!
Now reading this title – “Why can’t I just be normal?” – there are sure to be some people who will no doubt be responding;
“There is no such thing as normal!”
“What is normal anyway?”
Which is fine. Ok, I get that but there will also be people who understand exactly what I am talking about and maybe even say it to themselves.
Living with mental health issues is hard, really hard but being being friends with someone who has mental health issues can also be tough.
I have lost many friends over the years because of my mental illnesses but I have gained some fantastic ones too. I think, looking back, the reason these friends left my life is down to lack of understanding. Me not truly understanding what was ‘wrong’ with me but also those friends couldn’t understand why I would do the things that I was doing, why I would overreact etc. They never mentioned it or asked me about it. I have learnt not to dwell on this and that some people are just not meant to be in your life – it was just not meant to be.
Those of you that follow my blog will probably know that I am diagnosed with anorexia. I have lived with it most of my life despite only being officially diagnosed 4 years ago.
I am pregnant right now and actually I am still suffering. I am not restricting food or putting myself through any periods of starvation because I don’t want to harm my baby in anyway. However, I can feel anorexia still there in the background waiting like a coiled spring to leap back into action once I have had my baby. The point I am trying to make is that eating disorders – along with all mental health issues never leave you. They may lie dormant, sitting quietly in the background for weeks, months or years at a time, but they remain with you for your entire life.
I am currently 23 weeks pregnant – wow where of earth has that gone?!
I must admit I completely underestimated how different being pregnant the second time around would be. Running around after my 4 year old son who doesn’t understand the concept of “Lets sit down quietly for 5 minutes” for the last 7 weeks of the summer holidays has been tough!